Envy...

If I were her,

I would kneel

At every sign of sadness I see
Sealing your beautiful lips,
And never rise 

Until you smile again.

If I were her,

I would swear by the hot blood we share

These nails will never carve another man’s shoulders

And these eyes will never thirst
For another man’s magnificence,

Just as they never have before.

If I were her,

I would beseech God

To mold me into a rib again

And put me back in your chest.

Oh.. please God, put me back in his chest!

So I can shield his warm heart,

Like I once did, ages ago.

I would never let a pathway

Lead you away from me,

My mornings would shy away from rising,

If they knew you would turn away from me that day,

My hours would weigh heavy on my life,
If you went away.

The mountain of patience that is my history would crumble

And the fertile land that is my womanhood would be forever barren

I would learn how to forgive, for you

How to embrace submission with hungry arms,

And how to tame the volcanic pride in me, for you.

You would be oblivious to my battles…this I know

But to draw a playful smile across your heavenly face,

Or capture the scent of your breath in my hair every morning,

I would battle all that I am, with the rest of what I am.

If only I were her.

April 18^th, 2010